Pages

Monday, April 07, 2008

Love struck

Dear me,

Why does it always have to be me who's got to say sorry, can't she get it that at times things work either way? Maybe i've done something that might have been too much for her to bear. But does being the man in the relation mean you've to take all the crap that's hurled at you? I've always loved her because she wasn't the typical girl, the one who'd get happy if i gave her a flower, or one who'd like me to gift her a card. As a matter of fact that's the LAST thing that i'd do. There were times when she loved me as much as i did. But now it seems its more of a compromise rather than real love. I just find myself at a loss of words when i think about the last time we had a good talk for a full week without her thinking there's no future in this and it'll will never happen, or her thinking that she's not good enough for me. I've lost track of the times i'd had to call or sms an apology so that i could just hear her voice, or get even a missed call in return. I don't know what's so special in her that even on my worst days at work, a small 'hi' from her would change my mind. I've always wanted my partner to be someone who's not binding me to any conditions, or asking me to achieve certain objectives. But again and again i chase dreams that were never mine. I work so much to keep this relation intact. But now its making me feel bad, feel sad. Asking myself if it's all worth the pain. My mind says no, but as its with th heart, it says YES. What'll i do if this is how it's going to be? Or will it improve? Or will it get worse? Only you can tell my dear, only you!

11 comments:

Hari said...

Everyone in love feels the same once in a while. Don't give enough heed to your head when you make such a decision. Follow your heart!

To quote my favourite song from Jab We Met:
" na hai yeh pana, na khona hi hai
tera na hona jane, kyun hona hi hai
tum se hi din hota hai, surmaiye shaam aati, tumse hi, tumse hi
har ghadi saans aati hai, zindagi kehlati hai, tumse hi, tumse hi
...
main tera sarmaya hoon, jo main ban paya hoon, tumse hi, tumse hi
raaste mil jaate hai, manzile mil jaati hai, tumse hi, tumse hi
"

I find resemblance between you and Shahid's character in JWM. :D I sense pain and deep-longing in your words...

Hope things turn out Good!

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

Ninek Entha 'jab we met' thaleku pidicho? Anyways i wish ur words come true:)

Aparna S said...

nice way to talk to yourself :)
did 'she' read this btw?

Spartan said...

tat cud ve been a poem....expressin ur pain and all tat.........avasaanam virahakavi aayi alle........but dont lose hope.....it happens in relationships....and they kno the magic of mendin themselves...........btw....shud i forward her the link????or do u want me to tell her abt the post????anytime bro......

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

She's read it and asked me to take my head's decision. Bt i told i've always had jus one decision and tht's th one from my heart. Which is to have a life with her:)

Mone sparta, ithu viraham alla, verum vedana alla. Its just what i felt after a long fight and something i read in her blog. Don't ask me th url to her blog:)

Mr. Commonsensical said...

Interesting...

You will not get a satisfying answer for the question, 'is it worth all the pain?'

So I feel, cos you are too much, too deep into it to let go.

Gunnerz' Forever!!! said...

ninakku enthu patti chakkare;)aarada ninne venda ennu veche?nammaku vazhi indakkam..ithu pole pandu kure purakil nadannu nadannu avasanam njan everest parvatham keezhadakki(hope u got my drift;))..nice readin abt u man..been long..hmm

Sreehari Harikesh said...

i thought u would have written something of this kind after reading that comment at hari's blog.and here i found this.i wonder who the girl is??????

Hari said...

Abhi....................
Who's the girl?? Anyone i know?????? ;)

~==[[[ Abhi ]]]==~ said...

@ Common-(don ur title is too damn irritating)- Please don't be philosophical when someone says somethng like this. If you'd told this on the face, you'd have got one on the face[:D]

@ Gunner(Sabarish)_poda pooooooooooooomonnnnne, ninne njan poooonayil vannu kollum!

@ Sreehari-Well it happens that i've someone to love too! :D

@ Hari-Don't think you KNOW the gal.

Anonymous said...

Since this was april of this year, im am left to assume that this situation has been resolved.... if not i would like to say that i to have been in this situation. Often times when you find the person who makes a difference in your life, other things are complicating the situation even more. Its only when one can truely eliminate outside influence that one's heart and mind can make effective decisions. I believe that everyone has a sense of precognition especially when it involved relationships. Unfortunately this precognition is also there to warn you of possible negative outcomes. Therefore, if after all that you have done and said from both sides have not resolved the question that truely matters "Will i be truely happy in the end either way?" then perhaps reevaluating the circumstances may be in order. I have been through alot in my life, because of this i have learned some hard lessons. I hope that this response is unrelated to your current situation :), for even the manly of men still need to feel love.

-K
Lost Route
www.LostRouteMusic.com
www.myspace.com/lostroutemusic